


Mr. and Mrs. Iwa-chan

by Chrystie, kate882



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-09
Updated: 2016-05-09
Packaged: 2018-06-07 10:28:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6800005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chrystie/pseuds/Chrystie, https://archiveofourown.org/users/kate882/pseuds/kate882
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oikawa hadn't expected that he would actually become invested when a very attractive man had nervously handed him a phone number.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mr. and Mrs. Iwa-chan

Iwaizumi walked up to the really pretty man, just a few tables over, with an awkward smile, “Hey.”

Oikawa glanced up from the book he was pretending to read to look at Iwaizumi with a curious smile. “Hello.”

“So, you - uh - you dropped this earlier,” Iwaizumi handed Oikawa a napkin that he had very much never seen before with Iwaizumi’s name and phone number scrawled on it, and quickly swivelled around to head back to his table before Oikawa could say anything to him.

Oikawa blinked down at the napkin a few times, looking between it and Iwaizumi before pulling out his phone and calling the number. The target he was trying to watch probably wouldn’t move for a while.

Iwaizumi picked up the phone after managing to quell his blush, “Most people don’t call back so quickly,” he answered. Talking over the phone was a little easier.

“Most people don't leave before even trying to get the name of the person they're flirting with.” Oikawa countered, flashing a smile Iwaizumi’s way.

Iwaizumi would not admit to trying to avoid a face to face rejection. He was actually a little  surprised the man had called him at all. “Yeah, your name would be important. Mind if I ask for it now?”

“Hmm . . . I don’t know. It _was_ kind of rude of you to just walk off like that. How about you take me to dinner tonight, and I’ll give you my name. If the date is nice, I might even give you more than just my name.” Oikawa winked at Iwaizumi.  

“That sounds like a fair deal. Maybe we could even have the date _not_ over the phone,” Iwaizumi  bit back his smile.

“I think I’d like that.” Oikawa said with a grin. “I'll text you an address and time then.” He added as he noticed his target starting to leave. “But my break is sadly ending, so I can't stick around and chat.”

“Sounds like a plan, I’ll see you tonight.” Iwaizumi would, unfortunately, be stuck at the cafe for a little while longer.

* * *

“Iwa-chan, how are you on this beautiful evening?” Oikawa asked, even as water dripped off of his hair from the rain. “It might have been more beautiful if I had remembered an umbrella.” He added sheepishly.

“I think I'm doing a bit better than you,” Iwaizumi chuckled, motioning for Oikawa to sit down.

“Probably. You look dry, at least.” Oikawa replied, taking a seat across from Iwaizumi. “As promised, my name is Oikawa Tooru. It's nice to meet you face to face, Iwa-chan.” He said, flashing his brightest smile.

Iwaizumi made a face at the nickname, but didn't comment on it. “I wasn't expecting to get your name until the end of the date, but I'm not complaining.”

Oikawa’s smile turned into a smirk. “You get my name at the start of the date because your incentive to make it a good date is weather you get to take me home or not at the end.”

“That sounds like pretty good incentive,” Iwaizumi grinned.

* * *

Iwaizumi did get to take him home. Several times. Oikawa had more fun dating Iwaizumi than he'd expected to.

He was glad he'd given Iwaizumi his real name, because the more time they spent together the more Oikawa wanted it to be a long term thing.

“Iwa-chan, come watch a movie with me.” Oikawa draped himself across the back of the chair Iwaizumi was sitting in, wrapping his arms around Iwaizumi’s shoulders.

It was their first time spending a whole weekend together, and the second morning Oikawa woke up to find Iwaizumi already out of bed and doing paperwork at his desk.

Iwaizumi had been trying to catch up on the less interesting aspects of his work, most of which he’d fallen behind on from spending time with Oikawa. Not that he minded in the slightest. Oikawa was an amazing addition to his life, even if he was hesitant to admit it out loud. He tilted his head up to look at Oikawa, “Is it gonna be another shitty alien documentary?”

“Nah, I'm not awake enough to pay proper attention to one of those. Wanna watch a horror movie with me?” Oikawa replied, placing a kiss on the tip of Iwaizumi’s nose.

Iwazumi gave him a skeptical look, “I didn’t think you’d be someone who could handle horror movies.”

Oikawa tilted his head curiously. “Why not?”

“You just seem like the type of person to freak out during horror movies and have nightmares for weeks,” Iwaizumi shrugged.

“Sorry to disappoint. I love them. The more gruesome and psychologically scarring the better.” Oikawa said with a grin.

Iwaizumi quietly scoffed, “Okay. Just lemme finish this and we can watch the most mind numbingly terrifying thing you can find,” he pointed towards his papers. He was almost done so it wouldn’t take him too long.

Oikawa pouted. “C’mon. Just take a break with me.” He tried, pressing kisses along Iwaizumi’s jawline.

The comfort of Oikawa’s lips made it really hard to say no but he _really_ needed to finish his work. “Don’t pout. Just give me five minutes. You can pick a movie while you wait.”

“Iwa-chaaaaan.” Oikawa whined, resting his head on Iwaizumi’s shoulder.

“Don’t ‘Iwa-chaaaan’ me. I’m almost done,” Iwaizumi turned Oikawa’s face towards him to capture his lips in a kiss, “Wait a few minutes.”

Oikawa’s shoulders slumped and he gave Iwaizumi his best dejected look before going to the couch and huddling up under no less than three blankets as he looked for a movie.

Iwaizumi managed to finish the rest of the report he had been working on within the five minutes he’d promised Oikawa and promptly fell on top of Oikawa and his three blankets immediately after. “Did you pick something?”

“Iwa-chan, get off!” Oikawa whined, shoving at Iwaizumi as best he could while tangled up in the blankets.

Iwaizumi laughed quietly and rolled off onto the other side of the couch. He lifted up the blankets, as best he could with Oikawa hugging them to himself, and pulled Oikawa into his arms, “Stop pouting. I didn’t take that long.”

Oikawa snuggled up to Iwaizumi and flipped on the movie. “Long enough.” He replied.

“I’ll make up for it later.” Iwaizumi pressed a kiss to the top of Oikawa’s head as if it solidified his promise.

Oikawa smiled up at him before turning his attention to the screen.

* * *

“I'm borrowing your shower. You can do all your boring paperwork stuff while I'm in there.” Oikawa announced when the movie ended.

Iwaizumi stretched his arms over his head, popping out all the kinks from sitting still for so long, “Not like your work is any more interesting.”

“You don't see me doing it right now though.” Oikawa pointed out, pecking Iwaizumi on the cheek before getting up and heading to the bedroom to grab clothes before going to the bathroom to get his shower.

“Don’t bother grabbing pants,” Iwaizumi called after him, heading back to his desk.

“Your apartment is cold. Just take them off later.” Oikawa answered before closing the bathroom door.

“It’s only cold to you and your inability to keep warm!” Iwaizumi called out despite the door being closed.

When Oikawa emerged from the bathroom he was in one of Iwaizumi’s shirts and a pair of sweatpants, hair still damp, and pout on his face as he headed back to the bedroom with slumped shoulders to dig through his bag.

“Everything okay?” Iwaizumi asked with a raised brow, “Why’re you squinting like that?”

“Dropped my contact in your sink.” Oikawa muttered, finally finding his glasses case, hidden at the bottom of his bag.

“You wear contacts?” This was the first Iwaizumi had heard of Oikawa having bad vision.

Oikawa nodded, putting the glasses on with a slight pink tint to his cheeks. “Well, I do when I don't lose a contact to a sink.”

Iwaizumi was staring. He _knew_ he was staring, but it was hard to look away. The glasses looked _really_ good on Oikawa, so much so that he felt a little upset that he hadn’t seen them before. “You’re keeping those on when we have sex later.”

Oikawa blinked a few times in wide eyed surprise at that. “I don't know what I was expecting, but I don't think it was that.”

“They look good,” Iwaizumi grumbled, looking back down to his papers to hide his embarrassment.

Oikawa smiled a little at that. “I'll be sure to remember you like them then.”

Iwaizumi sighed. There was no way he was going to finish anything with Oikawa and his… _Oikawa-ness_ as a constant presence. He dropped his pen and swiveled around in his chair, “Come here.”

“I thought you were working?” Oikawa said even as he did walk over to stop in front of Iwaizumi’s chair.

“So did I.” He tugged Oikawa down to press a kiss to his neck and play with the wet strands of hair at the base of his neck. “You should probably dry this,” despite that, he didn’t let go of Oikawa.

“You’re right. I might catch a cold in this apartment.” Oikawa shot back.

“It’s summer, the AC needs to be on. You’re just cold blooded.”

“Maybe.” Oikawa smirked. “Or you're just hot.”

“I can’t decide if that was dorky or smooth,” there was a smile on Iwaizumi’s lips regardless.

“Who cares? It made you smile, and that's what counts.” Oikawa replied with a wide smile of his own.

“Dorky it is,” Iwaizumi said, pressing another kiss to Oikawa’s neck, “C’mon, we should actually dry your hair.” He got up and pulled Oikawa back to the bathroom to grab a towel.

“My hair is fine.” Oikawa protested, even as he let Iwaizumi pull him along.

“No, it’s not,” Iwaizumi murmured as he ran the towel through Oikawa’s hair.

“It's not like I'm going to _actually_ catch a cold in your apartment.”

“You could,” Iwaizumi countered, pulling the towel away. Oikawa’s hair wasn’t completely dry, but that was expected. It was dry enough though, so Iwaizumi could let the subject drop.

Oikawa adjusted his glasses, which had gone slightly askew while Iwaizumi manhandled him into having nearly dry hair. “Realistically speaking, it's unlikely, but I Iike that you care.”

“Who said I cared? Maybe I'm just making sure I don't get sick by making sure you don't get sick.” Iwaizumi pulled him back towards the couch and sat Oikawa in his lap, ignoring how his actions clearly contradicted his words.

Oikawa grinned. “So selfish, Iwa-chan. If I got sick you wouldn't be allowed anywhere near me.” Both because he wouldn't want to get Iwaizumi sick, and because he wouldn't want Iwaizumi to _see_ him sick.

“Nice to know that you care too.” Iwaizumi tightened his hold around Oikawa's waist and gave him something between a smile and a smirk.

“I do.” Oikawa easily admitted with a shrug.

Iwaizumi’s lips broke into a wide smile despite himself. He gripped Oikawa's chin to pull him down and slanted their lips together.

Oikawa laughed against Iwaizumi’s mouth, but kissed back after a moment. “Are we watching another movie, or do you have more work to do?”

“Am I really gonna get anything done with you around?” Iwaizumi asked with a deadpan tone.

“I don't know. Are you?” Oikawa smirked at him.

Iwaizumi roughly pinched Oikawa's nose, moving his head back and forth, “You're a little shit.” He let go to kiss him again, “I can finish it later.”

“Iwa-chan, that hurt!” Oikawa whined.

“I know, that was the point.”

“Mean, Iwa-chan! And right after I said I cared about you! Just for that, I hope you hate romantic comedies, 'cause that's what I'm playing.” He said as he picked up the remote to pick one.

“I don't particularly hate them,” Iwaizumi laughed, he actually kinda liked them.

“You would.” Oikawa wanted to frown, but Iwaizumi’s laugh was really nice, so he just picked one instead before relaxing in Iwaizumi’s arms to watch.

They watched in relative silence for most of the movie, save for a few laughs every now and then. It was only when the main characters finally got together that Iwaizumi knew he completely regretted letting Oikawa pick a romantic comedy. Tears welled up in his eyes and he quickly dried them before Oikawa could notice, only to realize that it didn't really matter because Oikawa had fallen asleep. Iwaizumi let out a quiet laugh at the endearing sight of him resting his head on Iwaizumi's shoulder with his glasses askew and his lips slightly parted. He took the remote out of Oikawa's loose grip and turned off the movie, snuggling closer to him to join him in his nap.

Oikawa let out a quiet whine of “Haijme” at the movement, but was asleep again just a few seconds later.

Iwaizumi’s eyes shot wide open and he couldn’t help but smile stupidly at Oikawa. He pressed another kiss to Oikawa’s lips and snuggled into him.

* * *

Oikawa was honestly starting to get a little annoyed. It had been kind of fun when he’d first started getting the competition on his kills, but now it was happening too much. Kills that should be easy were getting harder, and the source of his aggravation always managed to avoid any attacks Oikawa sent their way.

They were pretty even on the number of kills they took, but what really bugged Oikawa was not knowing what his competition looked like. Quick reflexes and a hood kept their face hidden. Granted, Oikawa wasn’t showing off his face either with all of his hair stuffed under a beanie and dark glasses taking up a good portion of his face when he was on jobs.

His eyes narrowed when he saw the lock to the building his target was in already broken. So, his new shadow was already there. With that thought in mind, Oikawa discarded caution and simply walked in, gun firing randomly in the hopes of hitting someone making an escape, knowing that his target was already dead if his competitor was inside. The other hitman didn’t seem to like to play with their kills. They got in and out, clean and efficient, which simply made it harder for Oikawa to catch him.

His new friend apparently hadn’t been able to make it out before Oikawa had run in, as the hooded figure rushed for the door Oikawa had just entered through during the split second Oikawa had his back turned.

“Fuck!” Oikawa sighed, walking over to the target to check for a heartbeat, even though he knew it wouldn’t be there. He sighed again when he didn’t find any signs of life, pulling out his phone to text Kuroo that he’d been beaten to his kill.

* * *

Iwaizumi woke up with a long yawn as he stretched out the kinks that had formed in his back from the night. He woke up to a cold and empty right side of his bed and he found it upsetting how lonely that felt. Oikawa had been apparently busy for the past week and a half, but with the way his excuses were phrased Iwaizumi had the feeling Oikawa was just avoiding him, which he really couldn’t figure out why he would be. It felt especially lonelier with his job trying to increase his workload - there was apparently some other company that was trying to compete with the one he worked with - and not having someone there to at least help him relax during the days he didn’t have to work sucked.

He reached for his cellphone on his bedside table and scrolled through his contacts until he found Oikawa. He didn’t have much hope of Oikawa saying yes to seeing him, but he could try. He tapped on Oikawa’s name and held the phone up to his ear.

“Hello?” Oikawa mumbled when he answered the phone, not quite awake enough yet to realize who he was answering the phone to, or that he hadn’t exactly been communicative lately with said person.

Iwaizumi felt a little of his anxiety dissipate. Oikawa had actually answered. “Hey,” he said a little awkwardly.

Oikawa said something that was probably “What’s up”, but it was a bit muffled by his pillow and the sleepiness in his voice. He’d had a late job the night before and hadn’t gotten home until around four in the morning, so conversation wasn’t exactly his strong point at the moment.

“Did you have a late night? You’re usually an early riser,” there was a bit of concern in Iwaizumi’s voice.

“Hmm? Yeah, a bit. Paperwork built up from forever ago that’s gonna be due soon.” He was starting to wake up a bit more, and was now very aware of who he was talking to.

Iwaizumi rolled over onto his stomach to hug his pillow as he asked, “Does that make you too busy to have lunch or dinner with me today? It’s been awhile since we’ve seen each other.”

Oikawa sat up, rubbing his eyes before glancing at his clock. It definitely was later than he usually woke up, but earlier than he’d planned on getting up that morning. “I’m afraid so. Sorry, Iwa-chan.”

Iwaizumi sighed. He’d expected that. “Okay. Are you ever gonna tell me what I did wrong to make you start avoiding me?”

Oikawa felt his stomach drop. “I’m not - I’m not avoiding you. I’ve just got a lot of work to do.”

“You’re avoiding me. We were both busy before, but still saw each other every few days.”

“. . . Listen, I’ve gotta get ready for work. I slept through my alarm, so it’s a good thing you called me, but I’ve got to go. We can talk about this later, Iwa-chan.” Oikawa said before hanging up, sighing and running his hands through his hair.

Iwaizumi glared at his phone, as if it were the reason for all his problems. Maybe he could corner Oikawa by going to his apartment. At that moment, he really hated that both he and Oikawa had never given each other their work schedules, not that he really had a set schedule to give Oikawa, but at least knowing Oikawa’s would have helped. He briefly wondered if it would be creepy to just wait outside his apartment until he got back from work, which he concluded that it was, but it was also his best option. With that, he pushed himself out of bed to get ready to go to Oikawa’s place.

Since he was already up, Oikawa decided that he would go into work to report on his job from the night before, and when he got home to find Iwaizumi waiting outside of his apartment he almost turned around, but he knew that wouldn’t go over well. “Iwa-chan, what are you doing here?” He asked, keeping his voice casual as he unlocked the door.

“I’m here to talk, since you obviously aren’t gonna do that over the phone,” Iwaizumi followed Oikawa in, his legs somewhat stiff from standing for so long.

“I told you, I needed to get ready for work.” Oikawa busied himself with trying to tidy up his already neat apartment so that he didn’t have to look at Iwaizumi.

“Well you’re off of work now, and you still won’t look at me, so I don’t know why you still won’t admit that you’re avoiding me.”

“What do you want me to do, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa replied, turning to face him with his arms crossed over his chest.

“How about you tell me what I did wrong so I can fix it.”

“Nothing. Nothing, you didn’t do anything wrong.” Oikawa uncrossed his arms to run a hand through his hair, starting to pace to get rid of some of the nervous energy. “Fuck. I’m sorry. You really didn’t do anything.”

“Then why haven’t we seen each other in over a week?” Clearly something was wrong, Iwaizumi just wanted to know what.

“Because I suck at feelings.”

And with that declaration, Iwaizumi felt more lost than when he’d first arrived at Oikawa’s place, “What?”

“I love you.” Oikawa blurted out, feeling a blush take over his face almost immediately after the words were out of his mouth, and he ducked his head to try and hide it. But he worked a job he couldn’t tell Iwaizumi about, and Iwaizumi might not even feel the same, and he was in far deeper than he’d intended when he’d agreed to date the hot guy who had so nervously given him his number. It scared him a little, if he was honest with himself. He hadn’t known what to do, so he’d just avoided Iwaizumi, and apparently that wasn’t the right way to go about it.

Iwaizumi’s eyes softened and felt his throat constrict as air seemed to stop entering his lungs. He closed the distance between him and Oikawa in two quick strides and cupped Oikawa’s face, tilting it up to look at him, “I love you too, doofus.”

“You’re not supposed to insult someone the first time you confess to them!” Oikawa tried to sound affronted, but it was hard when his cheeks were scarlet and his eyelashes were wet with unshed tears. “I really am sorry for avoiding you, Iwa-chan.”

“I wouldn’t have to insult you if you weren’t so dumb.” Iwaizumi leaned up to gently press his lips to Oikawa’s, “Just don’t do something like that again.”

“I’ll try, but I really am bad with feelings, so no promises. You might have to do this again at some point.” Oikawa told him. “You should have seen how hard I avoided Tetsu-chan when I accidentally called him my best friend in front of him for the first time.” So far Oikawa had managed to keep Kuroo and Iwaizumi from meeting through sheer willpower and a lot of ‘schedule conflicts’, but they’d both heard of the other.

“I might hit you if you end up doing this again,” Iwaizumi warned. Sometimes violence translated better than words.

“That's illegal and I'll complain.” Oikawa retorted, even though he knew Iwaizumi wouldn't actually hurt him.

“You’d complain no matter what I did.” Iwaizumi lowered a hand to Oikawa’s waist to pull him against him, his other hand going to Oikawa’s hair as he buried his nose in Oikawa’s shoulder, “Seriously though, never do that again. I missed you,” he let his words be muffled by the fabric of Oikawa’s shirt.

“If I do, feel free to come do this again. I'll even give you a key so you don't have to wait outside.” Oikawa offered.

“Thanks for the consideration,” Iwaizumi said dryly.

“I really am sorry.” Oikawa told him, wrapping his arms around Iwaizumi and holding on tightly.

“At least I’ll know how to get you to talk to me next time you do this.”

Oikawa offered a sheepish smile. “I’ll try to not do it again.”

“Good.” Iwaizumi pressed a kiss to the side of Oikawa’s neck, glad that things had been fixed relatively easily.

* * *

It was only a few weeks later that a knock came at Iwaizumi’s door early in the morning, while Oikawa was still sleeping in Iwaizumi’s bed.

Iwaizumi carefully detached himself from Oikawa and threw on a pair of pants, only to find a man with dishevelled hair at his door. “Um, hi?”

“Yo.” The man raised a hand in a wave, giving Iwaizumi a smile that was only half friendly. “I’m Kuroo Tetsurou.”

Understanding washed over Iwaizumi, and there was a small twitch of his lip from Kuroo’s very obvious half-warning aura, “You’re Oikawa’s best friend.”

“Ah, good, he has talked about me then.” Kuroo replied. “I wasn’t sure since he’s been trying to keep me from meeting you.”

“Is that what he’s been doing? I thought he was just trying to keep me away from the majority of his personal and professional life,” Iwaizumi waved Kuroo in, pointing towards the couch, “You want something to drink?”

“Sure.” Kuroo stepped in, looking around as he did so. “Is Tooru here?” He asked, spotting an alien documentary dvd case on the TV stand.

“Yup, he’s sleeping,” Iwaizumi said, heading towards the kitchen to start a pot of tea.

Kuroo followed him to the kitchen instead of sitting on the couch. “I’m still just trying to figure out which one of us he was trying to hide from the other. If he’s hiding you from me then you’re doing something wrong. If he’s hiding me from you then he’s just worried I’ll embarrass him.” Which was a fair thing to worry about.

“Well if you think I’m doing something wrong, feel free to lash out at me at any time,” it was probably a mistake to say that so freely, given the various things he’s taken the effort to hide from Oikawa, but Iwaizumi was always open to people telling him he’d fucked up in some way. It was easier to fix if he knew the problem.

Kuroo looked at him consideringly. “Yeah, he’s probably worried about me embarrassing him then.” He decided.

“Isn’t that your job as his best friend?” Iwaizumi asked with a smirk.

Kuroo grinned at that. “Of course. He just wants me fired from that job.”

“I think we’re gonna get along just fine,” Iwaizumi chuckled, just as the tea started to boil. They sat on Iwaizumi’s couch, exchanging dumb or embarrassing stories about Oikawa. In that time Iwaizumi learned that Oikawa once lit his kitchen on fire, used to smooth talk himself in front of a mirror to practice, and is apparently a very chatty drunk. He probably would have learned more had a mortified shriek not come from the direction of his bedroom.

“Tetsu-chan, what are you _doing_ here?!” Oikawa practically launched himself across the room to land in Kuroo’s lap so that he could cover Kuroo’s mouth with his hand. “No more. You can’t say anything else to him.”

“Why not? I liked what he was saying,” Iwaizumi laughed, wrapping an arm around Oikawa’s waist to drag him off of Kuroo’s lap and into his own.

“No, you have to forget everything he told you!” Oikawa said, struggling to break free of Iwaizumi’s hold while Kuroo just laughed at them.

“Tooru, I didn’t even get to the _really_ embarrassing stuff. You gotta go back to sleep so I can tell him.”

“You could just tell me anyway,” Iwaizumi’s grip around Oikawa tightened, “I think his screams and whining will make them more entertaining.”

“I’ll tell him embarrassing things about you.” Oikawa threatened Kuroo.

“I hardly know him. Who cares?” Kuroo shrugged.

“And you wonder why I don’t introduce you to people. Iwa-chan, let go of me!”

“Why should I?” Iwaizumi asked with a smirk.

“Because this is cruel and terrible and I need to get Tetsu-chan out of here immediately.” Oikawa replied, trying to pry Iwaizumi’s arm away from him. It was the first time he was actually upset about how well muscled Iwaizumi’s arms were.

“But I like your friend’s company. He’s a pretty good story teller.”

“You hear that, Tooru? He likes me. You should introduce me to everyone you know,” Kuroo grinned.

“No.” Oikawa told him flatly, before turning to Iwaizumi to try another tactic. “Haijme, let go of me. Please.” He pleaded, looking at Iwaizumi through his lashes with a slight pout on his lips.

Iwaizumi hummed, leaning up to kiss Oikawa’s pout, “Tempting, but nah.”

Kuroo laughed while Oikawa’s pout turned more genuine. “Shot down, Tooru. Hey, Iwaizumi, did you know that if you can get him to watch the Pokemon movie, he’ll _still_ cry when the Pikachu does.”

“Tetsu-chan, when I get free, I’m killing you.” Oikawa informed him.

“Well, if you’re already killing me I guess I might as well tell him about how you came out at the office.”

“Please do,” Iwaizumi’s interest was completely peaked.

Oikawa groaned. “Please don’t.”

“I actually have pictures.” Kuroo added helpfully. “So, his original coming out wasn’t actually significant. He basically just told a girl that he already had the hots for another dude when she asked him out, but then someone else told him that he ‘didn’t look gay’, so the next day he came in wearing heels, pants so tight I was actually worried about him, and a shirt that had the word gay written in rainbow letters. He also carried around rainbow glitter and dumped quite a lot of it on the guy who told him he didn’t look gay. All of that to prove a point, and he’s not even gay, but pansexual.” Kuroo pulled up a picture on his phone to show Iwaizumi. “I’m still not sure what point he was trying to make, actually.”

“I don’t know either. I was just pissed. Please stop telling people about it.” Oikawa covered the phone with his hand so that Iwaizumi couldn’t see it.

Iwaizumi stared at the phone somewhat fascinated and turned to set his eyes on Oikawa once the picture was no longer visible, “How do I get you to wear those pants and heels again?”

“You don’t because you won’t like how long it would take to get the pants off.” Oikawa replied, hiding his face in the hand that wasn’t covering the phone screen.

Iwaizumi’s brows knit together for a moment, as if he was contemplating it, “You’re probably right. The heels would still be nice though.”

“I’ll wear those and the shortest shorts I own if you’ll kick Tetsu-chan out right now.” Oikawa offered.

“Low blow, Tooru. Using sex to get me out of here.”

“I’ll wear the shortest skirt I own if you’d prefer that, Iwa-chan.” Oikawa added as if Kuroo hadn’t said anything.

“It is a low blow,” Iwaizumi agreed, “But it might be working.”

“I’ve got a nice crop top you might like too. . .” Oikawa mused.

“How have you not broken any of this out against him yet?” Kuroo asked Oikawa incredulously.

“Yeah, how haven’t you?” Iwaizumi almost felt betrayed at not having seen them yet.

“I like to always have a bargaining tool up my sleeve.” Oikawa said with a shrug. “I’ll wear my glasses with that outfit.”

Iwaizumi turned to Kuroo with a sigh, “No hard feelings?”

Kuroo rolled his eyes. “Nah, it’s fair. Nice meeting you, Iwaizumi.” He said, getting up and holding out his hand to shake.

Iwaizumi finally let go of Oikawa to take Kuroo’s hand, “We should do this again some time.”

“Definitely. Next time it’ll be your turn to tell me embarrassing things.” Kuroo said with a grin. “Later, Tooru.” He ruffled Oikawa’s hair before heading out.

The minute the door clicked shut, Oikawa’s back met the couch, eliciting a startled sound from Oikawa, and Iwaizumi’s lips were already latched onto his neck, “We’re heading to your place for that stuff after a shower.”

“No we aren’t.” Oikawa answered. “Since you let him tell you embarrassing things about me, you have to wait, and just know they exist and that you’ll see them eventually, without knowing when.”

Iwaizumi groaned in annoyance and lightly bit Oikawa’s neck in retaliation, “Any complaints about doing it right now?”

“No, no complaints about that.”

* * *

Oikawa ducked to avoid the knife flying at him, flashing a smile towards his competitor. He’d won this one, and it seemed he wasn’t the only one who was no longer entertained by this competition. He couldn’t leave yet though. The hooded figure was blocking his exit.

The figure gripped another throwing knife between their fingers, poised and ready to launch it at Oikawa’s throat, seemingly having lost all patience with the dumb little game they had going on.

Oikawa used the corpse of their shared target as a shield, the throwing knife burying itself into the man’s forehead as Oikawa scanned the room for an escape.

The figure didn’t give him much of a chance to analyze his surroundings as they pulled out two guns, almost immediately after throwing the knife, to shoot bullets in every direction they could, which really just ended up with the corpse in Oikawa’s hands getting lodged with two guns worth of bullets. It was almost as if they were more interested in venting frustration than actually trying to kill Oikawa.

Oikawa decided to take a chance and simply make a break for it once the guns were empty. He threw the body towards the other hitman, trying to catch them off balance before dashing out the door.

The hitman let out a strangled growl of frustration as they struggled with the body that had been used as a projectile towards them. In the minute that they spent struggling with a lifeless, bleeding corpse, Oikawa had managed to slip out the door and away from the hitman.

* * *

It was over a month before Oikawa actually did break out the outfit, and he waited until they were going to be out for the whole day at an amusement park to do it, showing up at Iwaizumi’s doorstep in a white crop top and pink miniskirt and heels with his glasses perched on his face for the first time in quite a while.

Iwaizumi dropped his mug and made the executive decision that the amusement park could wait, pulling Oikawa into his apartment to push him up against the wall.

“Ah-ah, Iwa-chan. We have a date today.” Oikawa reprimanded with a smirk.

Iwaizumi would never admit to pouting, but with his bottom lip protruding slightly as he squeezed Oikawa’s ass from under the skirt, it seemed very much like that was what he was doing. “Can’t the date wait?”

“Nope. I’m planning to spend the whole day there.” Oikawa’s smirk widened. “The panties are pink too, just so you know.” He added.

Iwaizumi let out a mix between a whine and a strangled groan, as his head fell to rest on Oikawa’s shoulder, “I’m gonna kill you one of these days.”

“You like me too much for that.’ Oikawa replied. “Ready to go?”

Iwaizumi gave Oikawa’s ass one last squeeze in the hopes that it would last him for the rest of the day, before taking a step back. “I hate you so much right now.”

“Sure you do.” Oikawa placed a quick kiss on his cheek before stepping around him to get to the door, ‘accidentally’ dropping his car keys and bending down to pick them up.

Iwaizumi could feel his eye twitch. If he could make it to the end of the day without exploding, he was going to make sure Oikawa didn’t sleep until the day after.

“Iwa-chan, I bet I can win more prizes than you.” Oikawa declared on the drive to the park.

“Like hell you can. I hope you have a painful day of blisters for deciding an amusement park was the best place to break out heels.”

“If you think I don’t know how to walk in heels, you’ve got another thing coming, Iwa-chan. You still haven’t seen me in a dress and makeup. I make a hot girl, I’ll have you know.” He was pretty enough to go undercover as girls for jobs, and knew from experience that he made a rather good looking girl, if other people’s reactions were anything to go by.

“Stop doing this to me,” Iwaizumi groaned, “Just for that, you’re carrying everything you win.”

“Sure, and then when I drop something you won’t be the only one to know what color my panties are when I pick it up.” Oikawa agreed cheerfully.

Iwaizumi glared at the side of Oikawa’s head as he pulled into the parking lot.

He did, in fact, end up holding everything that he and Oikawa won, walking just a few steps behind Oikawa throughout the entire day to shoot glares at anyone who so much as glanced at Oikawa in a suggestive way.

“Iwa-chan, you’re being so possessive~” Oikawa said, putting a hand on Iwaizumi’s shoulder when someone whistled at him and Iwaizumi took a step towards them. “You’re the one I’m going home with.”

“I think I have every right to be possessive,” Iwaizumi huffed from behind a mountain of plushies.

“You’re still the one I’m leaving with, so I’m not sure what you’re worried about.”

Iwaizumi didn’t need Oikawa to tell him that being jealous was stupid, he already knew. That didn’t exactly stop him from feeling that way though. Just the thought that someone was objectifying _his_ boyfriend was enough to make his blood boil. Iwaizumi opted to stay silent as he shifted the plushies to hide most of his face, only letting his eyes be visible.

“Alright, you can be broody if you want, but it looks ridiculous while you’re holding a bunch of stuffed animals.” Oikawa informed him.

“And whose fault is that,” he grumbled.

Oikawa flashed him his best smile before stepping up to another booth to play.

By the end of the night, they ended up with a large pile of stuffed animals that almost reached Iwaizumi’s full height, making Iwaizumi completely regret taking part in the competition to see who could get more. They ended up with a tie after visiting every booth.

“I was really hoping I’d win.” Oikawa lamented as he led the way back to the car, slight pout on his face.

“I don’t think we should ever do this again,” Iwaizumi sighed as he dumped all the stuffed animals into the trunk and back seat.

“Why not? I had fun.”

“If we do, there’s no way you’re wearing something like that again. I’ll force you into some of my clothes if I have to. Other than that, we should remember to bring a few garbage bags so I don’t walk around balancing a mountain of fluff.”

“But you like it when I wear your clothes too.” Oikawa pointed out.

“Yeah, but other people won’t know the difference.”

“And here I was thinking you were just sexually frustrated, and that was why you didn’t want me to wear it again, but you’re still just jealous.”

“No, I’m still pretty sexually frustrated, it’s taking a lot of effort not to jump you right now. I still don’t like people looking at you like that though.”

“Happens all the time, regardless of what I’m wearing. People look at you too, Iwa-chan.” Oikawa said, starting up the car.

Iwaizumi responded with an annoyed huff.

“Just remember, they all get to look, but once we get back you're fucking me and they aren't.”

That did make Iwaizumi feel a little bit better and once they got back to his place, he swiftly abandoned all the stuffed animals in the car to pull Oikawa into the apartment, slamming him against the front door.

He happily released all his pent up sexual frustration multiple times that night without taking off any of Oikawa's clothing. He was more than a little thankful for how small Oikawa's panties had been.

* * *

“There - that can't be right. Did you say Iwaizumi Hajime?” Oikawa tried to keep his expression blank, but he was sure that surprise was still showing through, and maybe even betrayal.

“Yes. He appears to be the one you've been competing for kills with. Is there going to be a problem with that?”

“Does he know who I am?” Oikawa asked quietly.

“Given how much time he spends with you, I can only assume that he does. Didn't you know about him too? You're always with him.”

“I . . . yeah, I just didn’t think I was competing with him.” No. No he hadn’t known, and his world was flipping and he just wanted to find Iwaizumi and demand answers or find Kuroo and freak out. He wasn’t sure which, but he wasn’t going to show that in front of his boss.

“Well, if you have no problems with this, then I expect him dead no later than two weeks from now, got it?”

Oikawa had a lot of problems with it, but he knew that wouldn’t matter. Even if he was allowed to get out of it, someone else would be sent to kill Iwaizumi. So, he nodded stiffly and left the office, hunting down Kuroo and throwing himself into Kuroo’s arms as soon as he saw him.

Kuroo wasn't too sure what had happened, but he still petted Oikawa's hair back all the same, waiting for him to be ready to talk.

“Iwa-chan is . . . oh god, Tetsu-chan. I don’t-” he was glad his face was hidden against Kuroo’s chest, because he could feel panicked tears coming on. “I don’t know what to _do._ ”

“What happened to Iwaizumi?” Kuroo said calmly, even as he felt deep concern for his best friend.

“Nothing. Nothing happened to him. But I’m supposed to kill him because he’s a hitman too, and I didn’t even know. How did I not know, Tetsu-chan? Why am I finding out by getting assigned to kill him?” Oikawa’s whole body was starting to shake as he looked up at Kuroo for answers that he didn’t really think his friend had.

Kuroo’s eyes widened, needing a moment to find his words, “I doubt he knew about you being a hitman too. You're both probably in the same boat.”

“But what do I do? I can’t kill him, Tetsu-chan. I can’t do that to him, and the boss wants him gone in two weeks.”

“I… I don't know how I can help you, Tooru,” and he really wished he did, because it hurt to see his best friend like this.

“I have a date with him tonight.” Oikawa hid his face against Kuroo’s chest again. “And I’m going to have to act like I don’t know.”

“I think tonight . . . I think you should treat tonight like you would every date night. Make it a happy one,” _because it could be your last one_ , Kuroo left that unsaid, sure that Oikawa was thinking the same thing anyway.

Oikawa nodded, even as sobs wracked his body and he clung tighter to Kuroo. “I love him.” Oikawa whispered between sobs, not even sure if Kuroo could hear him, but he needed to say it.

“I know,” Kuroo rasped out, fighting back his own tears, “I know.”

* * *

Oikawa pulled himself together for his date with Iwaizumi, showing up at the other’s apartment a little early because of nerves, he knocked at the door and plastered on a pleasant smile.

Iwaizumi answered the door with his eyes slightly puffy and his nose red, as though he had been crying himself. He pulled on an awkward smile despite it, not meeting his eyes at the sight of Oikawa, “Hey, you're early.”

Oikawa took in Iwaizumi’s appearance with the new information in mind. His best guess was that Iwaizumi had found out today too. Probably in a similar manner to Oikawa. Or maybe the information was clouding his analyzing abilities. He wasn’t sure. “Traffic was better than I thought it would be. I brought you flowers.” Oikawa replied, pulling his hand from behind his back to hold out the roses he’d picked up on the way over, trying to take Kuroo’s advice of making it as nice of a date as he could.

Iwaizumi stared at the flowers in shock as he accepted them, the gesture making the small weight in his pocket feel so much heavier. “Thanks, you really didn't have to though.” He stepped aside to let Oikawa in, “I tried to make dinner and it turned out kinda shitty, so I ordered something.”

“I’m sure it turned out better than anything I could have made.” Oikawa replied as he walked inside, following Iwaizumi towards the kitchen.

The casserole Iwaizumi had tried to make, despite the distraction of his thoughts, sat on the counter, half prepared with more cheese thrown into it than it probably needed.

“Is everything okay, Iwa-chan? You seem off tonight.”

Iwaizumi flinched slightly at the accusation, “I'm fine. I'm just gonna go put these in my room,” he pointed at the flowers, “you can make yourself comfy on the couch, Netflix is already up.”

“Oh? Is this a Netflix and chill kind of date, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa teased, forcing a smirk.

Iwaizumi forced a scoff, deciding not to comment on how Oikawa seemed a bit off too. “It's whatever you want it to be.” He shooed Oikawa off towards the couch as he turned towards his bedroom. He placed the flowers on his bed and pulled the small box out of his pocket with a pained look, placing it in his bedside drawer. He apparently wasn't going to need it anyway.

He returned to the living room with what he hoped was a neutral look as he took his place on the couch next to Oikawa, pulling him up against him.

Oikawa wrapped his arms around Iwaizumi, resting his head on his chest and pressing play on the movie he had picked. “I chose one of those romcoms you secretly love.” He told him, looking up through his lashes at Iwaizumi’s face.

“I do not,” Iwaizumi grumbled indignantly.

“You do so.” Oikawa offered a small smile as the movie started and turned his attention to the screen.

Iwaizumi didn't make any further attempts to defend himself and opted to silently watch the movie. Even after the food arrived, both he and Oikawa continued to watch in relative silence. It was only when they reached the last quarter of the movie that Iwaizumi decided to break it, “Tooru?”

Oikawa looked up, a little surprised by the use of his first name. “Yes?”

Iwaizumi's arm around Oikawa tightened as he buried his face in Oikawa's hair, “I love you. So much.”

Oikawa felt his heart clench at the words. He took Iwaizumi’s hand in his, lacing their fingers together. “I love you too, Hajime.” He leaned up to brush his lips against Iwaizumi’s.

Iwaizumi felt the need to cry all over again. He deepened their kiss and pulled Oikawa onto his lap to pick him up and carry him to his room. That night, they did each other slowly, as if they were trying to remember every little detail about each other before they had to part. When they both reluctantly finished, Iwaizumi pulled Oikawa to him and held him as close as he could.

It took hours, but Oikawa eventually felt Iwaizumi’s breaths even out, signalling that he’d fallen asleep. He slowly extracted himself from Iwaizumi’s arms to look around the room. He needed to see with his own eyes. Some kind of proof that Iwaizumi really was who his boss said. Not that it would make him feel any better or more willing to kill him he just . . . he just needed to know.

He found two guns and a knife before he found the small box that made his breath catch in his throat and his heart stop in his chest. He opened it to stare at the ring inside with wide eyes that already had tears gathering in them.

“You weren’t supposed to find that,” Iwaizumi said quietly, his voice still raspy from sleep.

“Sorry.” Oikawa said just as quietly, looking up at Iwaizumi.

“I was gonna give that to you tonight, y’know.”

“You didn’t though.” Oikawa pointed out, still holding onto the box as he moved to sit on the bed next to Iwaizumi.

“You already know why, don’t you?” Iwaizumi had figured out some time during dinner that Oikawa at least had a suspicion, given how off he was acting.

Oikawa nodded, not knowing what to say and not trusting his voice to say anything.

“You can keep it,” Iwaizumi offered, “It was supposed to be yours anyway.”

Oikawa slipped the ring onto his finger before reaching under Iwaizumi’s pillow, which had shifted while he was sleeping enough to reveal the knife he’d had hidden under it, passing the weapon to Iwaizumi. “Make sure I’m buried in it then. I can’t kill you. You’re going to have to be the one to get this job.” He smiled at Iwaizumi even as his tears finally fell.

Iwaizumi sprung up into a sitting position, shock etched all over his face. “I - you . . . No! I’m not - I can’t kill you!”

“You say you’re going to all the time. I can’t go back to my boss without you dead, so just send me back dead instead. Tell Tetsu-chan that it was my choice so that he doesn’t come after you.” He took Iwaizumi’s wrists in his hands and positioned him so that he was aiming the knife at Oikawa’s stomach. “Just make it quick, yeah?”

Desperate tears welled up in Iwaizumi’s eyes, “Tooru, stop it!” Iwaizumi knew that the night had to end with at least one of them dead, and he knew what his orders were, but it was _Tooru_ at the end of the knife and he just - he _couldn’t_ do it.

“Make me!” Oikawa countered, moving Iwaizumi’s hand closer, feeling the sharp tip of the knife poking his skin.

Iwaizumi’s eyes widened, and he was glad - not for the first time - for the extra bit of strength he had when compared to Oikawa. He pulled his arms away, flinging the knife to a random corner of the room. He pushed Oikawa down onto the bed and pinned his arms over his head, “I’m not going to kill you! Stop trying to die! If I had to pick between my life and yours I’d throw mine away in a heartbeat, so stop!”

“Then you already understand why I'm trying to throw mine away.” Oikawa smiled sadly up at him.

“I do,” Iwaizumi lowered himself to hide his face in the crook of Oikawa’s neck, “That’s why I’m not trying to run a knife through myself too. I know you’d stop me.”

“You're not wrong. What are we going to do?”

“I don’t know,” Iwaizumi quietly admitted.

“My boss gave me two weeks. What about yours?”

“Two and a half.” Iwaizumi lifted himself up to look down at Oikawa.

“Then we have two weeks to disappear.” He didn't have a fully formed plan yet, but he had the beginnings of an idea.

“You have something in mind?”

“I'm working on it. We’d have to leave. Our agencies, Japan, our names, but we could possibly get away. Or one of us could transfer companies. I’m not sure which is more dangerous.”

Iwaizumi tossed both ideas around in his head, “It’d start a war between agencies, but if I transferred, you could at least still have Kuroo around.”

“If a war started the chances of me, you, and Tetsu-chan all getting out alive aren't high. Do you remember what I told you Tetsu-chan did for a living though?”

“You said he was a tech nerd,” Iwaizumi answered, releasing Oikawa’s arms to roll onto his side and hold Oikawa properly.

“Yeah. I wasn't lying about that. He could make us disappear. Get us new names and accounts, but he'd have to leave too after doing that.” Oikawa was pretty sure Kuroo would agree for him, although he hated to ask that much of his friend.

“Are you sure you want to ask him for that?” Iwaizumi didn’t want to be the reason for a strain to form in Oikawa and Kuroo’s relationship, and he could see that it bothered Oikawa.

“I don't _want_ to. But I want you and him to both be safe. And I’d tell him he can turn me down,” that he could turn Oikawa in if he wanted, even though he wouldn't, “but if it can keep everyone safe, shouldn't I at least try?”

“If that’s what you think is the best idea, then I won’t stop you as long as you come out safe too.”

Oikawa couldn't really promise that. “I don't know what's best. I'm trying to figure that out.”

Iwaizumi angled Oikawa’s face up to look at him, “ _We’ll_ figure something out. Give me some credit, we do do the same work.”

Oikawa gave him a tiny smile. “Alright. We’ll figure something out then.” He agreed.

* * *

“Hey Tooru, Iwaizumi,” Kuroo tried to sound casual as he barged into Iwaizumi’s apartment unannounced.

“Tetsu-chan? What are you doing here?” Oikawa sat up in bed, sheets pooling around his waist.

Kuroo ignored both Oikawa’s and Iwaizumi’s naked states, too used to seeing Oikawa naked from walking in on Oikawa having sex or his morning afters on multiple occasions, “I was thinking a lot yesterday. Y’know the whole you two needing to kill each other thing, and I thought up of how to help.” He fished around in his pocket and pulled out three white cards, “New ID’s for all of us,” he grinned, apparently having come to the same conclusion as Oikawa had the night before.

Oikawa didn't even seem to care that he wasn't wearing clothes - a sign that maybe he was a little too comfortable with his friend - when he scrambled out of bed to hug Kuroo. “You're the best. I must have been a way better person in a past life to have you as my best friend now.” He declared.

Iwaizumi, while he was extremely grateful for what Kuroo was doing for them, shifted awkwardly as he sat up, keeping his lower half covered, “Y’know there’s something extremely discomforting about the guy I gave a ring to last night hugging another guy while he’s naked, even if it is his best friend.”

“Don't make it weird, Iwa-chan. He's helping us.” Oikawa reprimanded.

Kuroo didn’t seem to care in the slightest about Iwaizumi’s discomfort, instead choosing a different part of what Iwaizumi said to freak out about, “He proposed? Yesterday?” Kuroo grabbed Oikawa’s left hand, holding it up to his face to find a ring that had not been there previously.

“Sort of. I kind of found the ring and he told me I could keep it, but we were kind of distracted by the whole ordered to kill each other thing. The proposal was more implied.” Oikawa answered.

“Ah, that makes more sense. I would’ve had to talk to you about his sanity if he actually did propose,” Kuroo nodded in understanding.

“You know I’m still here,” Iwaizumi sighed. “So, who are we now and where are we from?”

“Americans apparently. From New York. I like New York. Remember that mission we had there, Tetsu-chan? Big cities are easy to blend in with.” Oikawa answered in flawless English, peering at the cards Kuroo was holding.

“America’s a pretty typical choice, but not a bad one,” Iwaizumi nodded, “When do we leave?”

Kuroo pulled out three new American passports, “In two days. Better start packing.”

* * *

“Tetsu-chan, do you have cameras in here or something? How do you always walk in right before we have sex?” Oikawa whined when the door opened, knowing from experience that Iwaizumi wouldn’t just continue even with Kuroo there. He’d tried to get him to a few times with no success.

“‘Cause as your best friend, I’m also a professional cock block. You should know that,” Kuroo chuckled, throwing the two a peace sign.

Iwaizumi sighed and lightly nudged at Oikawa to get off. He was somewhat thankful that they hadn’t gotten to stripping each other yet.

Oikawa narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Kuroo, ignoring Iwaizumi’s attempts to move him. “You didn't deny the cameras.”

“Tooru, the last thing I care about is spying on you two when all you guys do is fuck,” Kuroo scoffed.

“That isn't _all_ we do,” Iwaizumi tried to argue despite the fact that everyone in the room clearly knew that that was what they did most often.

“Shh, Iwa-chan. Let him think that. He doesn't need to know more.” Oikawa placed a hand over Iwaizumi’s mouth. “It could be all we did, if _someone_ didn't keep barging in.”

“Always here to help, buddy,” Kuroo grinned.

“Why are you even in here?” Oikawa asked, going over a mental calendar to try and figure out if they were supposed to be doing something that day.

“We were supposed to have a bros day. Y’know you and your best cockblocker sorta day, while your husband goes to work.”

“I thought that was tomorrow.” Oikawa muttered, but got up anyway. “Alright. Sorry, Iwa-chan, looks like I belong to Tetsu-chan today.” He said as he looked through the closet for something to wear since he was still in his pajamas and glasses at the moment.

“No, it’s fine,” Iwaizumi waved him away, “Go have fun with your asshole best friend.”

“I’d be more offended if it wasn’t true.”

“At least you know.”

“Yup.” The minute Oikawa finished changing Kuroo linked his arm with Oikawa's and dragged him out of the room, “Have fun at work, Iwaizumi~”

“Bye, Iwa-chan!” Oikawa called, waving with his free arm.

Iwaizumi couldn't help but smile as he got up to get ready for work. While he did miss his old life with his old company, the American one that he, Oikawa, and Kuroo had managed to find their ways into was an interesting shift. The three largely worked together, but there were a few hits every now and then that only required one of them on the job. Their old agencies back in Japan had yet to find where they were, but Iwaizumi didn’t doubt that they would at least hear of the three of them being alive and still working eventually.

For the time being, he would enjoy the relative peace they had found themselves. He rummaged through his closet and pulled out a belt that held two guns, a knife, and multiple bullet cartridges. The kill would be easy, so he didn’t really need anything more than that, but it never hurt to be careful. After all, he had someone to come home to at the end of the day.

**Author's Note:**

> Conversation directly after Kate wrote the last line:
> 
> Chrystie: That is the cheesiest line I've ever seen  
> Kate: You asked for a way to end it!  
> Chrystie: Yeah, still cheesy though


End file.
